Many times, I have been guilty of walking past people who are down-and-out. They would be sitting by a street corner, or the entrance of a train or subway station with an upturned cap or opened tin in front of them. Often, I would catch sight of a few coins, even dollar notes in their well-worn cap. These people, who are most likely rough sleepers and homeless are a common sight in many big cities. They blend into our city landscape amongst the hordes of pedestrians that walking pass them seems nonchalant, as if walking past a fire hydrant or post box.
Source: Pixabay (For illustration only)
I often wonder to myself if these people are genuine in their 'cries' for help? It is not that I have never given anything before, but I have heard many stories from close friends and family members of unscrupulous behaviours from so called, 'homeless beggars'.
Here is one story. Upon seeing a shabby and impoverished looking man sitting on a mat begging, with seemingly all his worldly possessions around him, a friend of mine approached him and asked if he would like some food. She had a heartfelt intention of getting him a meal from a nearby fast-food outlet. She was horrified to hear the man retorting in return wanting money rather than a meal. Dismayed, she walked away disappointed.
Here is another story, this time experienced by my wife. We were both holidaying in a city we had never been to before. While walking in the middle of the city's central business district we saw a couple of young children in front of us near a street intersection. They were obviously begging as we saw people shooing them away and giving them the 'cold shoulder'. As we approached the intersection, the pedestrian lights changed to red which meant that we had to wait before we could cross over. Jenny who felt sorry for the street children who were in tattered clothes and looking forlorn with outstretched hands, decided to give them some loose local currency. To our shock and surprise, we soon found ourselves surrounded by other children who seemed to appear from nowhere. We knew we couldn't give to everyone and signalled our intention. Fortunately for us, the pedestrian lights changed to green, and we hurriedly crossed the street. After getting safely over to the other side, we turned around and saw an elderly woman shepherding these children away from the street corner but leaving two smaller children behind. After sharing this incident with friends later that evening, we learnt that this was a tactic used by scammers who use children to fleece unsuspecting people, usually tourists for money. It was a sad situation especially for the little children some of whom looked as young as five years old. This turned out to be not a once only location or incident, as we saw this repeated in other street crossings as we returned to our hotel.
I think our son Jonny has the same streak of compassion as his mother. He was about 10 years old when we visited Sri Lanka for the first time. Like many tourists we would spend the first few days of our visit walking around to check out the 'neighbourhood'. While we were out walking one evening along the streets of Colombo, Jonny saw a scruffy looking beggar who had paraplegia which affected the beggar's ability to use his legs to walk. They looked deformed. The man, who had knotted hair and beard, and probably had not washed for days, was lifting his frail body with his hands to move around. After laying himself at a spot, he would have his hands out stretched, calling out to people for alms. While I have seen people with that condition before, this would have been Jonny's first time seeing a person with that state of disability. After passing the man in our walk, Jonny hurried to his mother and asked if he could have some money to give to the beggar whom we had just passed. Jonny was given some local currency. He then, by himself walked back to the man and placed the money in a tin that was there. The beggar acknowledged the gift Jonny had given. I believe that incident made a lasting impression on Jonny. He returned smiling because he was able to do something positive for someone. It certainly created an impressionable memory for me as it was almost 20 years since it happened.
We all know of situations, some covered by media, of people who beg as a full-time job and who could possibly make more money than working somewhere. Furthermore, they could be spending their ill-gotten gains on alcohol, drugs and/or gambling. However rather than looking at the deviousness of some people to scam the innocent by acting poor or homeless and living a fake life, there are many people who have fallen on to hard times and have dropped out of societies support network. While some countries have a social support system, many countries do not have a welfare system for their citizens. The truth is, tragedy can afflict anyone. Circumstances could result in someone hitting rock bottom, ending up homeless, penniless, and possibly begging as a result. These may be brought about by serious health problems or disabilities, substance abuse and drug addiction, mental illness, job loss, being thrown out of home, discrimination, poor financial decisions or any number of challenges. And while wealthy countries have support systems, we still have people in these countries begging in the streets.
Back in the 1990s the acronym WWJD was popular, with bracelets, bumper stickers, book marks, and even printed tee shirts. WWJD stood for 'What Would Jesus Do?' I recall from experience that many a situation that arises calls for a spontaneous decision. As a Christian this usually involves a spiritual prompting, some call this 'spiritual discernment'. I believe the incident involving Jonny was an inner spiritual prompting of compassion (a God speaking moment). Scripture reminds us "to be kind and compassionate to one another" (Ephesians 4:32).
Source: Internet (For illustration only)
It is interesting to read in the Bible that Jesus also met beggars during his ministry. In the Gospel of Luke, chapter 18, scripture reports on Jesus healing a beggar of blindness. A poignant moment that is recorded in verse 41 and 42 is the question that Jesus asked the beggar, "What do you want me to do for you?" He [the beggar] said, Lord, let me recover my sight." And Jesus said to him, "Recover your sight; your faith has made you well."
The salient point for me and when addressing the question, "What would you do if you met a beggar?" is to be prepared, when spiritually prompted, to ask the question, "What do you want?", or something similar. I think that is an important question without presumptions. My friend in the first story did just that by asking the question, "Can I get you a meal?" But it turned out the fella didn't want a meal but wanted cash (even if he needed a meal). Seeing people begging with a sign indicating their plight (if true) can be very heartfelt, and which sends a message to passers-by.
Source: Unsplash (For illustration only)
My friend Aaron wrote this post which illustrates the emotions we all have, certainly I have, when confronted by someone begging. In Aaron's case, it was not someone begging seated by the roadside, but a young person who approached him at a fast-food outlet. It is copied here with permission. (I have not edited the post. Aaron is a Gen Z, and writes as if speaking to me. He wrote and posted this message to my WhatsApp account at 4am one morning).
I slept like 9PM yesterday, obviously quite early, and I woke up after midnight and felt quite hungry, so I walked to the McDonald's near the Queen Victoria Market to get some food. When I was eating, a young guy (with an Aussie accent, definitely a local guy, looks the same age as me) suddenly approached me, asking me to buy him some food cause he was so hungry, had no food in the past day. I was quite shocked and was thinking about if I would be in any trouble. Turned out he was just politely asking, didn't even raise his tone. But the first thing that came to my mind was some people pretending to be in need (e.g. some homeless people do have houses in further suburbs, they just enjoyed to live as a homeless in the city, or some beggars were relaxingly sitting on the same spot for a month without trying to find a job), so I politely declined his request by repeatedly saying I was sorry. I also asked him to ask around (I was quite curious why he picked me instead of someone else). He didn't try to ask others, looked pretty upset, and left.
After finishing my meal, I thought that if he was really in need, he would likely be staying around and keep seeking help. I walked out, and turned out he was hanging around the front gate. So I walked to him, explained why I declined his request earlier, and briefly asked about his situation. He told me that he got no money at all, was kicked out of his place recently and didn't have a job. I complained that nowadays, trusting someone was becoming harder and harder, but ultimately, I would feel quite bad if I happened to decline someone who was genuinely in need. I then agreed to buy him a meal. He shook hand with me and I clearly felt that his hand was so cold, no wonder why he said he hadn't had food for the past day. After paying for the meal in the McDonald's app and telling him the order number, I left.
After reviewing this incident, I think I may use better approach next time. If the same situation occurs, I'll tell the guy that I wouldn't give away a meal for free and ask the guy to do something for me (can be anything, such as spending 5 minutes on telling me their story), which converts a donation to an exchange.
Source: Pexels (For illustration only)
Perhaps there is a lesson for all of us; to be discerning, to have compassion, to show kindness, and to give when it's awkward to do so to someone with a real need. And if the situation is right, exchanging the charity with a conversation can create the opportunity for more understanding, with less stigma attached.
We are asked to show ourself in all respects to be a model of good works, even to those who are down-and-out in life. Blessings!
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